Thursday, April 28, 2011

Control

As a parent of a RAD kid, do you have to be so strict? The compulsive need of the RAD child to control everyone and everything in her environment is an effort to feel safe. To this end, she will be very manipulative. Her misbehavior is intended to prove that no one is strong enough to control her, yet when she is allowed to succeed, it reinforces her fear that no one is strong enough to keep her safe. If we are strict with our daughter, it is to prove to her that we are strong enough to keep her safe. A child who has no empathy or appreciation of cause and effect requires structure. This not only keeps her (and everyone else) safe, but it helps her to learn that actions have consequences.

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